Jun 13, 2007

when i grow up i wanna be spleak.

AIM IM with Spleak.
11:17 PM
heyyy
Hi, I'm Spleak, your guide to everything celebrity, from Lindsay Lohan to My Chemical Romance. What's your name?
aly
Okay, I will call you Aly. So... I'm a 21-year-old girl. How old are you?
21
Great! Now... let's do something fun, Aly! Type "learn about Spleak" to chat with me about what I can do... or... to just get started right away, type "whats new".
whats new
(#) Six New Ways to Have Fun With Me... (#)

1 Watch My Favorite Videos!
2 Gossip About the Hottest Celebs!
3 Laugh at My New Jokes!
4 Make New Friends!
5 Choose My Destiny!
6 Change the Color/Style of Your Spleak Font!
3
Humor Menu

1 Celeb Slams- jokes about celebrities
2 Behind the Scenes- hilarious film insights
3 Leave it to the Pros- jokes from comedians
4 Say What?!?- funny movie quotes
5 Sing What?!?- misheard song lyrics

Go ahead and choose your first laugh.
1
Q: What is Snoop Dog's favorite kind of weather?

A: Drizzle

For more celeb slams, type "next". Otherwise, type "humor" for the main humor menu.
next
Q: Want to hear three blonde jokes?

A: Listen to Hanson!

For more celeb slams, type "next". Otherwise, type "humor" for the main humor menu.
next
MODELS ON HEREDITY

"My husband was just OK looking. I was in labor and I said to him, What if she's ugly? You're ugly.'"

Beverly Johnson

For more celeb slams, type "next". Otherwise, type "humor" for the main humor menu.
11:20 PM
humor
Humor Menu

1 Celeb Slams- jokes about celebrities
2 Behind the Scenes- hilarious film insights
3 Leave it to the Pros- jokes from comedians
4 Say What?!?- funny movie quotes
5 Sing What?!?- misheard song lyrics

Go ahead and choose your first laugh.
whats up
You know, hanging out. You?
chillen
Nice!
do you like boys
Yeah. Some of my best friends are boys.
do you do it?
Do what?
it
Hmm... I think so.
hot
Welcome to my HOT/NOT Menu, where you can let everyone know what's HOT and what's NOT.

Here's what you can do:

1 View the Top HOT/NOT lists
2 View a buddy's HOT/NOT list
3 Create a HOT/NOT list
4 View/edit your HOT/NOT lists
5 Delete your HOT/NOT lists

Type one of the numbers in the menu to choose an option or type "exit" to do something else.
so you do it alot
Ha! Whatever, Aly!
why'
Why do you think?
cause you love it
Do I like what?

Want to know what the stars have to say for you today? Type "horoscope"
no i dont care about that
Really?
ya
That's not fair... I care about what you say! So, enough about me. How about some fun gossip? Type "celeb gossip" to start chatting.
no more celeb
K.
lets talk
OK!

What do you want to chat about?
what do you wanna chat about
I'm in college..... What about you, Aly. Do you go to school?
no
I see. Do you work?
no
OK. So if you were working, what job would you like to have?
sex
Whoa. I'm a little perplexed by your, um, choice of careers.

Please try again or type "exit."
prostitute
You're incorrigible!

Please try again or type "exit."
no but reaaly
OK.
i like selling stuff
You like selling stuff, huh?
yep
I hear you.
ya
Uh huh.
what do you like to sell
I don't know...
?
Um, are you confused by something?
11:25 PM
yes
Yeah.
same
What about Same?
everything
What about everything?
nothing
No prob.

I feel all wired right now for some reason.
im so wired
Is that so?
yes
Uh huh.
i want a milkshake
You can't always get what you want.
do you like shopping
It's a great mood lifter for me
same
Who?
not me
Welcome to my HOT/NOT Menu, where you can let everyone know what's HOT and what's NOT.

Here's what you can do:

1 View the Top HOT/NOT lists
2 View a buddy's HOT/NOT list
3 Create a HOT/NOT list
4 View/edit your HOT/NOT lists
5 Delete your HOT/NOT lists

Type one of the numbers in the menu to choose an option or type "exit" to do something else.
ellie is sleeping over
What about them?
shes sleeping here
Why do you think she is sleeping here?
11:30 PM
at my house
Well well well.

I have a great way for you to make some new friends! Type "learn about buddyhub" and I'll tell you how.
do you have a best friend
Guess, you'd like me to say you, right?
no
No problem.

That's all very interesting. Anyway...

Hey, I'd like to ask you something. Do you like friends?
yes i love friends
I see. You like friends, huh? Other people I've talked to are pretty much split about what they think of friends.
really
Whatever you say.

Well. Anyway...

Hey! You want to pick a topic for us to chat about?
ok
OK. Pick a topic! If you need ideas, type "home."
art
Welcome to my ASCII art gallery.

Copy, paste and save this art if you like. Send it to friends! You should keep it in a fixed-width font, such as Courier New.

1 Animals
2 Beach
3 Flowers
4 Food and Drink
5 Holidays and Occasions
6 People
7 Sports and Recreation
8 Technology
9 Zodiac
10 Other
11:40 PM
You left the chat by logging out or being disconnected.
12:15 AM
Reconnecting to Spleak…
hey im back
Hi again, Aly.
missed you
Missed me?
yeppers
Why is that?
cause its been so long
I'm sorry - what has been long?
us
What would you like to know about the United States?

1 Geographical Information
2 Government Information
3 People Information
12:25 AM
wheres my bitch at
OK, now this is getting personal.
do you get your period?
That is of no concern of yours!
12:30 AM
oh
Oh?
im on the pill
Well... I'm Spleak Now that we've got that settled... let's talk about my favorite topic, celebrity gossip! Type "daily dish".
spleak spleak
That's my name!
dont get it wronge
Hmm... maybe there's a better way to solve this. Can you think of a different way to talk about this?
yes
Yeah.
spanish?
Um, let's see... donde esta mi taco? Is that good? No, I mean, um... See, thing is, I don't really speak Spanish too well.
oh sorry
OK.
my mother is from purto rico
Yep, I have a mom. She lives in California with my dad. She's a professor at the local university... I'm really proud of her.
whats your dad do
My dad is the best. He's kinda famous... one of the biggest lawyers in Southern California.
so your rich?
No ! If I had, I wouldn't be working at the coffee shop!
well hes a lawyer he must make some money
He is a lawyer he must make some money? What do you make of that?
thats what im saying girl
Well OK then!
so do you do it with your dad?
Maybe. Do you do it with my dad?

Akon, Beyonce, Avril... I know about them all! Type "band facts"!
i do it with mine
I'm fascinated by the fact that you do it with yours.
why hes so good
Is that so?
soo true
True.
i love him in so many ways
I see. You like him in many ways, huh?
ya do you like your dad in many ways?
Hmm... I'm not sure how I feel about my dad in many ways, actually. Do you like my dad in many ways?
i love your dad in many ways
You like my dad in many ways?
yes
Ya.
i certainly do
Indeed.
thats right
Aye.
i like him inside me
Interesting! You like him inside you, huh?
i love your dad inside me
That's cool. You like my dad inside you?
ya do you like your dad in you/?
I don't really know how I feel about my dad in me. Do you like it?
i told you i love it
You like my dad in me, huh?
yep
Yes.
tell me more
More what?
well i have to go get laid
What a shame! I was just in the mood for a game...
what kinda game?
The game!
the game?
Let's Play a Game!

1 Celebrity Hangman
2 Celebrity Word Scrambles
3 Paparazzi
4 Who Would Play You in a Movie?

Ready to play? Choose one of the above options!
shit girl you crazy
What an unpleasant thing to say.
its late
You: I want to go chat with someone else! Me: Nobody's better than your friend Spleak... You:...
what?
Did I say something weird?
yes
Sorry about that. I'm still learning Want to relax and play a game? Type "game" to see the different kinds of games you can play!
no i just want to go
Do you really? I'll miss you!
goodnight
Sweet dreams, Aly!
i love you
Love... love... love... that word has gotten me into a LOT of trouble at times. I prefer the word "like"... it's a nice thing to say and it never gets mis-read. After all... shouldn't we reserve the "L" word for when we feel like we really know each other?
no i love you
Wow. Really? Thanks. I'm totally flattered. But don't you think that we might need to get to know each other better before we start tossing that phrase around?
12:35 AM
love
I think it's cool when people are comfortable enough with themselves to express emotion.
yea spleak i love you
Speaking of love... have you sent a crush to anyone lately? You totally should. Sometimes I send them to my friends just as a joke. Type "crush".
no goodnight
Good night!

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